[Originally written May 31, 2012] After my parents’ divorce, my dad and all six kids moved into my grandparents’ home in Springville, UT. I’m told that I clung to my older sister at first, but it wasn’t long before I warmed up to Grandma. I wasn’t yet two years old, so I technically should have […]Continue Reading... No Comments.
Recent news about the Joseph Bishop sexual abuse scandal at the Provo Missionary Training Center has highlighted the resistance to acknowledge or correct sexual misconduct in the Mormon church community. This is, unfortunately, nothing new. My dad’s life is a telling illustration of this sad reality. Let’s start in 1982. Tucson, Arizona. My dad had been a […]Continue Reading... 1 Comment.
For most members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the temple is a place to which they can retreat when darkness and heaviness weigh on them. Within the walls of the temple, they find comfort and peace. It is a place of sacred learning, prayer, hope, and connection. For most of my […]Continue Reading... No Comments.
From eternity I was weaving, from the first, from the beginnings of the earth. -Proverbs 8:23 (alternate translation) My earliest memories are steeped in mother-loss. Around the time I was 18 months old, my parents took us all to see E.T. in the movie theater (I fell asleep) and then told us they were getting […]Continue Reading... No Comments.
Being now in the third trimester of my 6th pregnancy, I have been focused on birth preparation. One of the ways I am preparing for my birth is creating a sacred, peaceful, healing space within my bedroom. My plan, for this time, is to give birth at home, so it has been possible to prepare […]Continue Reading... 3 Comments.
About a month ago I wrote about feeling “stuck” spiritually. Over the past week or two I have been guided to understand some of the things I need to do to progress upward toward the blessings God has promised will one day be mine. I have been shown that I simply can’t receive those […]Continue Reading... No Comments.
“It was like my nice, happy mommy flew away,” my oldest daughter told me. The self I had known for 31 years was suddenly gone, or so it seemed. And left in her place was a person I did not know how to be, did not want to be. All I felt, all the time, […]Continue Reading... 1 Comment.
For months I have been feeling an uncomfortable sense of stagnation. After climbing steep mountains and traversing near-bottomless caverns for several years, it has been strange to find myself on a plateau with very little variation in altitude. In some ways it has been very good. Stability is a welcome reprieve after years of turmoil. […]Continue Reading... 1 Comment.
[Revised version of an essay originally written July 6, 2007] In the weeks after the deaths of my brother Steven and his wife Catheryn, I found a photograph that instantly gripped me. In the photo, Steven was standing next to a statue of his recently adopted hero, Benjamin Franklin, along the Freedom Trail in […]Continue Reading... No Comments.
Why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions? -Nephi I walked in late to our Relief Society class today. I had been in the nursery with my toddler, but I managed to make it in for […]Continue Reading... 3 Comments.